these last days of summer

The past couple of days have had glorious weather in the 80s instead of the high 90s and 100s we've suffered through since late Spring. I'm feeling the need to do all the things I wanted to do this summer that I haven't already. Once of those was taking G to Cumberland Park, which is right next to the Titans stadium, just across the river from downtown Nashville.

Cumberland Park is fantastic because of its water jets and wading pool. It's perfect especially for tiny kids, so I was hoping G would love it. At first, he clung to me like a monkey, but he reluctantly let me put him down after a bit. He had a tight grip on my hand for a while after that, and then eventually he was off on his own. He'd return now and then to touch my leg, as though reassuring himself, and then he was off again.

I know he looks pretty serious in most of these pictures, but I swear he was loving it by the end. He didn't want to go and protested having to leave. We had already been there for over an hour, and our feet were very wrinkly!

I didn't really want to leave either... but it was taco night. Nothing really stands in the way of taco night.

extra great great-grandparents

We went down to Alabama for the 4th of July, like we often do. I think I've only spent one 4th in Nashville and I don't remember celebrating it by doing anything. I hate the car ride back to where I grew up, though I guess I shouldn't complain about a measly 2.5 hour drive.

Florence always seems like home. I haven't lived there for more than a summer in twelve years, and I've been in Nashville full time for six. But my parents' number still says "Home" on my phone, and every corner of my grandparents' house and yard is familiar to me. I grew up next door to them and probably spent more time over there than I did in our double-wide trailer. It's so weird to see G playing in their yard the way I did when I was little. I'm so happy that he's getting to know my grandparents.

My mom's parents were as close to me as grandparents could possible get. I saw them almost daily, and they're tangled up with most of my memories of my childhood. Everyone who meets them loves them, and you'll never hear anything negative said about either of them even though half the town knows who they are. They are the most generous people you will ever meet. The stories they have to tell are endless.

I don't get to see my grandparents near enough now that I live a state away. But going to Florence always feels like coming home.

first swim of summer

This afternoon, we took G to my father-in-law's community pool for the first time this summer. He did so well last summer that I wasn't expecting much trouble. Well, at first, he was so not digging that pool.

The poor babe was actually kinda trembling and clinging to me for dear life. He spent most of the first ten minutes gesturing wildly outside of the pool as in I wanna go that way or trying to climb out if we got close to the edge.

Yeah, that's him throwing his leg way up over the edge of the pool. And me laughing because he looked so darn funny.

He never actually cried, so we decided to keep him in the water and make him tough it out. After going in deeper and spinning around a lot, he gradually decided that the pool wasn't going to kill him. In fact, he became a huge fan of the pool after that.

The next time he whined was an hour later when we made him get out of the pool. That boy can kick! We would hold him in front of us on his belly and he would kick like mad, his little face smiling with delight and his mouth panting with the effort.

I'm thrilled that he warmed up to playing in the water - I'm stuck on the idea of getting him swim lessons this summer so he can go through life being a much stronger swimmer than I am. I felt so much cooler after that swim too, so I know pool time will be fantastic as my belly gets bigger.

Parthenon ahoy

Today, the hubs and I went to the Parthenon. It was hot as Hades outside, so we didn't stay long. But by golly, I wanted some pics of G in front of that huge building, and I was gonna get what I wanted. You just don't tell the pregnant lady "no."

...Is it too soon to start using that excuse?

Anyway, it's difficult to get an almost two-year-old to stand still in one spot for very long. But I finally got it. Nevermind that he looks irritated with me.

I took a closer-up shot, and yes, he definitely seems to be grumbling to himself.

Dang it, mama! All I wanna do is run!

Like this!

 On a side note, how cute are his new Timberland sandals?

Also on a side note, his hair as gotten crazy. We must be feeding him well because I feel like that hair has grown a ton in the past couple of weeks. I'm still not sold on getting an official haircut yet, but I did take the scissors to it tonight. Sob. Don't worry, I only cut off one long curl in the back that was longer than all the rest and a few long pieces in the front.

I love love love his hair, but I think it's approaching time for a real haircut. Just a little...

playground playtime

So this month's NaBloPoMo is all about play. I know I haven't been in the most playful mood in the past few months. Honestly, sometimes it takes a lot of effort for me to leave the house with G. Playgrounds aren't exactly stress free places for me. I had to stop going to G's Tuesday morning Gymboree because a mother there brought in her newborn named August. Sigh.

I find a lot of pleasure in getting G out and about, however. He just loves exploring new areas and being allowed to run off on his own. The more I force myself to take G places, the easier it gets to let go and let him be a toddler.

I hate this hat, but he has to wear it when we're out in sunny weather for a lengthy period of time, doctor's orders. We're doing all that we can for the next three months to help that scar on his eyelid heal.

Now, we all remember G's first emergency room visit. Aka, a moment of slide-induced mommy guilt that lasts forever. G ended up fine, but I haven't been able to look at a slide the same way since. I haven't even been able to even encourage G to go down a slide on his own, even though I know that's much safer than me going down with him.

But I've been trying to take a step back and not hover so much. I know my hovering is anxiety-based. I know it's because of the miscarriage and I don't want that to have any lasting effect on my behavior toward G. I feel like I'm only allowed so much freak out about it before it all gets ridiculous. I mean, do I really need to bring up my middle-of-the-night breakdown the week after my D&C when I thought G had stopped breathing? Yeah, let's not let that embarrassment happen again.

So I put on my big girl pants and decided to give G a bit of a nudge to go down what looked like a large, wide, and fairly calm slide at a park in my Alabaman hometown.

I can tell you, and I'm not proud of it, that I broke out into a sweat. What if he pitched forward and slammed his face onto the slide? What if he broke his neck? What if he broke a leg because his foot got stuck? What if he freaked out halfway down? Oh yeah, my anxiety was at a high.

But you know, the babe got it. He knew what he was doing. He sat down, pushed himself off the edge, and slid and scooted his way down that slide.

I was so proud of my toddler-babe. He had pretty much ignored slides until that moment, but with this slide, he was all about it. After he went down once, he was in love. I think he probably went down twenty more times before we called it a day. It was 85 degrees and muggy in deep South Alabama, and G's cheeks were bright red from the heat.

I know I need to back off more when it comes to G on playgrounds. I'm still his spotter, there to catch him if he falls and prevent any major spills. But I want him to gain confidence in his own skills, and for him to do that, I gotta hang up my mama hat sometimes.

And keep my anxiety to myself.

grayson says: oh HECK no

Grayson says,

My parental units have decided it's time for me to experience new things in life. I don't really like the word new unless it's "new book" or "new set of blocks." New + toy = awesome. New + water = I hate you, parental units.

I am very, very unamused by the new thing they wanted me to try this past weekend. It was large and wet and cold. It sprayed water all over the place. And did I mention it was wet?

Mama tried to convince me by pointing that this water spraying thing was awesome.

I showed her by pointing just what I thought about this new idea. Mama, go that way!

Get me outta here! I mean it!

Granma got me a nice fluffy towel to dry off from the torture. I appreciated that.

I really liked the towel. In fact, it was quite tasty.

I did overhear the parental units talking about making me try out this water spraying thing again later in the summer. Again. What's wrong with them? Didn't I make myself clear this time?

Until we meet again, water spraying thing.